ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
They posted an apology in the Notes app.
It was addressed to the fans. The person they hurt didn't get a screenshot.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Love is patient. Your partner is not, and has started a note on their…
- You "can't do mornings". You also can't do afternoons, evenings or emails.
- Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone. Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do…
- The house will be tidy again one day. The day they move out. Tidy,…
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- Nobody has ever said "thank goodness it's Monday". Except a manager, and he meant…
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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