ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The spark never fades.
It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint funeral plan.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
- Every summit sends a very strong signal. The planet keeps not receiving it.
- Everything happens for a reason. The reason is you. It's always been you.
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
- Your Sunday-night plan for Monday was ambitious. Monday read it, laughed, and forwarded it…
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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