ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house.
Nothing will. Have the coffee.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
- Your birthday cake now needs a risk assessment. The candles are outnumbering the years…
- Doom spending is buying a heated eye mask because the news was bad. The…
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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