ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 25 JANUARY 1995
Money can't buy happiness.
You'll never have enough to check.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- You put "entrepreneur" in your bio. You've sold one pair of trainers on Vinted…
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
- Everything happens for a reason. The reason is you. It's always been you.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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