ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The award show ran four hours.
The only winner was the advert break.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- There's no I in team. There are two in "invoice still unpaid". And one…
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
- Every company now has an AI assistant. It's the only member of staff nobody's…
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands. It will be the…
- The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. You took it…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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