ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You "don't do small talk".
You also don't do big talk, phone calls, emails or replying. You do "vibes", and nobody can invoice those.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- True love is choosing the same person every day. They're choosing, daily, whether to…
- You said you'd "touch grass" this weekend. You took a photo of grass, posted…
- It's not a career ladder. It's a hamster wheel. The hamster has a LinkedIn…
- You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up. Eleven kilometres later you'd caught…
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
- You don't have a spending problem. You have an income problem, and it's terminal.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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