ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 27 SEPTEMBER 1997
You deleted the app "for good".
That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it and posted about deleting it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Lessons will be learned. By whom, and when, will also be learned. Eventually. Possibly.
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress". It said the…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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