ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your birthday cake now needs a risk assessment.
The candles are outnumbering the years you've got left.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- "We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise. One of you will die…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
- Parenting is ten percent love and ninety percent asking where the other shoe is.…
- Dating apps let you meet hundreds of people. All of them are "just seeing…
- Not all who wander are lost. You are. The map gave up.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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