ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
TUESDAY, 12 JANUARY 1999
Your back now goes out when you sneeze.
It goes out more than you do.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Tomorrow is a fresh start. Your problems have the new address. They've already moved…
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
- Your startup is an app that replaces a phone call. With a waitlist, a…
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
- Someone laminated an "Acceptable Behaviour" poster for the office kitchen. It will still be…
- Some people run marathons. You run late, and you still come last.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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