ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Some people run marathons.
You run late, and you still come last.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your back now goes out when you sneeze. It goes out more than you…
- Tomorrow is a fresh start. Your problems have the new address. They've already moved…
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
- Your startup is an app that replaces a phone call. With a waitlist, a…
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
- Someone laminated an "Acceptable Behaviour" poster for the office kitchen. It will still be…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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