ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 2 AUGUST 1999
Your call is important to us.
Not important enough to answer, but important.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're not a CEO. You're one person with a logo, a free email account…
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- Kids grow up so fast. Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and…
- Find your purpose. It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key…
- You "don't do small talk". You also don't do big talk, phone calls, emails…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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