ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Make your money work for you.
Yours quit in 2019. It works for your landlord now.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your boss hasn't taken a sick day in ten years. He has, however, given…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
- You put "entrepreneur" in your bio. You've sold one pair of trainers on Vinted…
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- You call yourself "a bit of a foodie". You've ordered the same chicken 64…
- Consistency is key. You've said "I'll go tomorrow" for three years. It's the only…
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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