ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 22 JUNE 2001
You say "it's not that deep" a lot.
Your Notes app has 300 entries and every one of them is that deep.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback. It cost three…
- Your friends' group chat went quiet. It didn't. They made a new one. Same…
- Some days you're the pigeon. Most days you're the statue, and nobody remembers who…
- Some people run marathons. You run late, and you still come last.
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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