ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 29 JUNE 2001
2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees are getting different memos now, mostly from a specialist.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback. It cost three…
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- Your squad misses you, says the notification. Your squad is four strangers and a…
- Be yourself. Everyone else is taken. They were picked first. You're what was left.
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
- Everything happens for a reason. The reason is you. It's always been you.
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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