ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 27 JUNE 2001
Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought.
It renews automatically. So does the guilt.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your squad misses you, says the notification. Your squad is four strangers and a…
- Be yourself. Everyone else is taken. They were picked first. You're what was left.
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
- Everything happens for a reason. The reason is you. It's always been you.
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
- You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback. It cost three…
- Your friends' group chat went quiet. It didn't. They made a new one. Same…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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