ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.
They were picked first. You're what was left.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands. It will be the…
- Micro-dating is a thirty-minute coffee to see if there's a spark. There wasn't. She…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- Tomorrow is a fresh start. Your problems have the new address. They've already moved…
- You've got a side hustle, a passion project and a podcast. Combined monthly income:…
- Everything happens for a reason. The reason is you. It's always been you.
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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