ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 31 JULY 2002
The return to office is completely optional.
So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet there you are, ranked 41st. They're "reviewing" 41st.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Every subscription you forgot about still thinks of you monthly. That's more than your…
- Things will look better in the morning. No. They'll just be better lit.
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- You said you're "so busy" this week. Your screen time says eleven hours a…
- Every Monday you swear this week will be different. You've sworn it nine hundred…
- Monday has its own support group. The group is everyone. The meetings are also…
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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