ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 5 JULY 2002
Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once.
They'll merge. You'll be the one let go.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- It's not a career ladder. It's a hamster wheel. The hamster has a LinkedIn…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- Your 5am routine went viral. You did it once, filmed it, and have slept…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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