ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The update is 200GB.
Your free afternoon was smaller.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said "it's giving" about your own life. It's giving overdraft. It's giving rent…
- The return to office is completely optional. So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet…
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
- Some people run marathons. You run late, and you still come last.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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