ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You say you're "an old soul".
You're 21. The only old thing about you is your phone's battery health.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- It's not a career ladder. It's a hamster wheel. The hamster has a LinkedIn…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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