ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 12 SEPTEMBER 2003
AI agrees with you more than any human ever has.
That's not wisdom. That's a well-mannered hostage with a monthly subscription.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- Your soft launch was a hand in a photo. The hard launch never came.…
- Love is patient. Your partner is not, and has started a note on their…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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