ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 15 SEPTEMBER 2003
“Just one more game” of FIFA was the most dishonest sentence in the English language.
Then they renamed it. The sentence survived.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- Fortnite was free to play. It was not free to stop.
- AI agrees with you more than any human ever has. That's not wisdom. That's…
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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