ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Nobody has ever said "thank goodness it's Monday".
Except a manager, and he meant your Monday, not his.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your birthday cake now needs a risk assessment. The candles are outnumbering the years…
- Children are a blessing. They're also why the remote is in the bin and…
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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