ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 14 JUNE 2007
The house will be tidy again one day.
The day they move out. Tidy, silent, and you'll hate every inch of it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Tomorrow is a fresh start. Your problems have the new address. They've already moved…
- You don't have a spending problem. You have an income problem, and it's terminal.
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- “I'm here for the right reasons.” The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a…
- You're "healing your inner child". Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- Start the week strong. Or at 9:14, camera off, pretending your face is a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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