ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You have an eleven-step skincare routine.
Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is doing its best. It isn't a miracle worker.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
- You "work best under pressure". You don't. You just only work under pressure.
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
- You can do anything you set your mind to. Your mind has set itself…
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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