ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing.
When you leave, someone will fight over the plant.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Some meetings could have been an email. You'll spend four years of your one…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- Every subscription you forgot about still thinks of you monthly. That's more than your…
- Your startup is an app that replaces a phone call. With a waitlist, a…
- You swore you'd never sound like your parents. You just said "because I said…
- You said "it's giving" about your own life. It's giving overdraft. It's giving rent…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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