ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 11 DECEMBER 2010
You said "it's giving" about your own life.
It's giving overdraft. It's giving rent arrears. It's giving a group chat that muted you.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
- You have 47 tabs open. Three are jobs you'll never apply for, one's a…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- Be yourself. Everyone else is taken. They were picked first. You're what was left.
- “Too close to call” means nobody knows. It is said by people paid a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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