ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up.
Eleven kilometres later you'd caught three pigeons, a cold and a physio waiting list that will outlive the app.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
- Start the week strong. Or at 9:14, camera off, pretending your face is a…
- Some meetings could have been an email. You'll spend four years of your one…
- Strangers online have voted you "not wrong". The same strangers once voted to give…
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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