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ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED

DAILY DEMOTIVATION

A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.

ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION SATURDAY, 8 OCTOBER 2011
You deleted the app "for good".
That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it and posted about deleting it.

— Zack, unqualified

VERIFIED
UNHELPFUL

PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE

  1. You are a valued member of the team. So was the last person in…
  2. Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
  3. Everything happens for a reason. The reason is you. It's always been you.
  4. You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up. Eleven kilometres later you'd caught…
  5. You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
  6. Be yourself. Everyone else is taken. They were picked first. You're what was left.
  7. You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.

THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR

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Newsletter / Issue No. 445

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