ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your out-of-office reply is the most confident thing you wrote all year.
Nobody noticed you were gone.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
- Love is patient. Your partner is not, and has started a note on their…
- He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped…
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- Your step counter used to set goals. Now it just sends "Hello?" like a…
- Strangers online have voted you "not wrong". The same strangers once voted to give…
- Start the week strong. Or at 9:14, camera off, pretending your face is a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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