ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
You took it in 2016. You've been sitting down since.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
- Nobody notices when you do your job well. Everyone notices when you leave at…
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- Every Monday you swear this week will be different. You've sworn it nine hundred…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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