ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You pre-ordered it for the cape.
The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Passive income takes a surprising amount of active effort. Mostly explaining it at parties…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands. It will be the…
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- You swore you'd never sound like your parents. You just said "because I said…
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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