ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress".
It said the same when you opened it by accident. It'll keep saying it after you've gone, if nobody cancels the subscription.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- "Let's take this offline" means "let's never speak of this again." That's also the…
- The consultation runs for twelve weeks. The decision was made in week zero.
- You "grew out of" your old friends. They grew out of waiting for you…
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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