ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 1 JANUARY 2015
You "love deeply".
Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do his writers.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You call yourself "a bit of a foodie". You've ordered the same chicken 64…
- Kids grow up so fast. Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and…
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- Your inbox reached zero once. The server was down. You were briefly free and…
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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