ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Age is just a number.
So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than your salary.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're "healing your inner child". Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult…
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
- Teamwork makes the dream work. It also means six people are ready to blame…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
- Quality family time: everyone on a different screen in the same room, harvested by…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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