ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 13 MAY 2015
You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment".
It took you three days to reply "thanks".
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Be yourself. Everyone else is taken. They were picked first. You're what was left.
- Every company now has an AI assistant. It's the only member of staff nobody's…
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
- You're "healing your inner child". Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult…
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
- Teamwork makes the dream work. It also means six people are ready to blame…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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