ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You say you're "an old soul".
You're 21. The only old thing about you is your phone's battery health.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
- Quality family time: everyone on a different screen in the same room, harvested by…
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
- You are a valued member of the team. So was the last person in…
- "We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise. One of you will die…
- Your chatbot calls every one of your ideas "a really insightful question". Zack has…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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