ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Monday morning has the energy of a printer that knows you're in a hurry.
The printer has better job security.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
- Be yourself. Everyone else is taken. They were picked first. You're what was left.
- Every company now has an AI assistant. It's the only member of staff nobody's…
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
- You're "healing your inner child". Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult…
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
- Teamwork makes the dream work. It also means six people are ready to blame…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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