ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're "so random".
You've told the same "so random" story at every party since 2022.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Everything happens for a reason. The reason is you. It's always been you.
- Your Sunday-night plan for Monday was ambitious. Monday read it, laughed, and forwarded it…
- Nobody notices when you do your job well. Everyone notices when you leave at…
- You did the Mannequin Challenge again for old times' sake. The standing still was…
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
- “Just one more game” of FIFA was the most dishonest sentence in the English…
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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