ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You quit your job to "find yourself".
Found you. You're on your parents' sofa, and the Wi-Fi password has been changed.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Beach body ready? The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't…
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
- Micro-dating is a thirty-minute coffee to see if there's a spark. There wasn't. She…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- You have an eleven-step skincare routine. Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is…
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- You're not a CEO. You're one person with a logo, a free email account…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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