ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your out-of-office reply is the most confident thing you wrote all year.
Nobody noticed you were gone.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You don't have a spending problem. You have an income problem, and it's terminal.
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- You're "healing your inner child". Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult…
- Beach body ready? The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't…
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
One quote. Every morning. Delivered before coffee, when you are weakest and the day has not yet had the chance to disappoint you itself.
No spam. Just disappointment. Unsubscribe whenever you regain hope.