ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Everyone's bringing back the dog filter.
Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look on its own since March, and it doesn't come off when you close the app.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
- The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. You took it…
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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