ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 1 MAY 2020
"It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English.
It will be only Monday every week for the rest of your working life.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- Parenthood is a long journey from "mama" to "can you send money" to them…
- You're ageing like a fine wine. Expensive, slightly sour, best kept in the dark,…
- You "don't believe in labels". You believe in being kept as an option.
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
- You're "taking a social media break". You announced it on social media. Twice. With…
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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