ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Youth is wasted on the young.
You wasted yours too. Old age is next, and you've got form.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
- "It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English. It will be only…
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- Parenthood is a long journey from "mama" to "can you send money" to them…
- You're ageing like a fine wine. Expensive, slightly sour, best kept in the dark,…
- You "don't believe in labels". You believe in being kept as an option.
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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