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ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED

DAILY DEMOTIVATION

A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.

ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION SATURDAY, 24 OCTOBER 2020
You "don't believe in labels".
You believe in being kept as an option.

— Zack, unqualified

VERIFIED
UNHELPFUL

PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE

  1. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. You took it…
  2. No pain, no gain. You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your…
  3. Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
  4. Some people run marathons. You run late, and you still come last.
  5. You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
  6. You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
  7. You "can't do mornings". You also can't do afternoons, evenings or emails.

THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR

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Newsletter / Issue No. 445

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