ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Nobody notices when you do your job well.
Everyone notices when you leave at 5:01. Your retirement will get a shorter email.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- Things will look better in the morning. No. They'll just be better lit.
- Every Monday you swear this week will be different. You've sworn it nine hundred…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
- The update is 200GB. Your free afternoon was smaller.
- You are exactly where you're meant to be. That should frighten you more than…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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