ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Parenthood is a long journey
from "mama" to "can you send money" to them choosing your care home.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
- Every relationship has a honeymoon period. Yours was the walk from the bar to…
- Parenting is ten percent love and ninety percent asking where the other shoe is.…
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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