ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
"It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English.
It will be only Monday every week for the rest of your working life.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- Every Monday you swear this week will be different. You've sworn it nine hundred…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- Parenthood is a long journey from "mama" to "can you send money" to them…
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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