ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You say you're "an old soul".
You're 21. The only old thing about you is your phone's battery health.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The house will be tidy again one day. The day they move out. Tidy,…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- You have an eleven-step skincare routine. Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is…
- Every Monday you swear this week will be different. You've sworn it nine hundred…
- He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped…
- You have 47 tabs open. Three are jobs you'll never apply for, one's a…
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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