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ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED

DAILY DEMOTIVATION

A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.

ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION THURSDAY, 6 FEBRUARY 1958
You're "manifesting abundance".
The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.

— Zack, unqualified

VERIFIED
UNHELPFUL

PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE

  1. Mistakes were made. The Notes app has never once said by whom.
  2. The update is 200GB. Your free afternoon was smaller.
  3. Every summit sends a very strong signal. The planet keeps not receiving it.
  4. You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
  5. Some people run marathons. You run late, and you still come last.
  6. Your Sunday-night plan for Monday was ambitious. Monday read it, laughed, and forwarded it…
  7. They're taking time away from social media. You know because they posted about it…

THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR

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Newsletter / Issue No. 446

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